Learning to Linger

           I live a fairly busy life. I’m a college student taking 18 credit hours a week. I am also an RA, a president of a club, and a true people person who loves to spend time with her friends. Recently, while on the phone with my mum, she said something that caused me to reevaluate the busyness of my everyday routine. She said, “Ciara. You need to learn to linger.” At first I was confused by this statement. What did she mean, “Learn to linger”? I lingered! My friends and I sat in the caf for a few minutes after we finished eating most days. I was great at finding places to go and things to do that would prevent me from returning to my homework. I loved to go and visit my residents and talk to them. But, after looking at myself and my routines, I realized that I actually do not linger. I pop into my residents’ rooms on my way down the hall and out the door. My prolonged sitting in the cafeteria is usually because someone at our table is still eating. My plethora of activities that seem more important are merely ways to procrastinate on my homework. I realized that I was constantly rushing to get everywhere.

                So, I vowed to make a change. One night, I stopped in the duty office of a different residence hall on my way back to my room. I visited with some of my RA friends. We talked, laughed, and had a lot of fun. I hardly glanced at my phone and had no idea how long I had really spent there. It felt nice though. I talked and laughed and had a great time with my fellow RAs and did not feel like I was late for something or needed to be somewhere. Another night, I met my friends at our little food court area to grab something to eat. After we finished eating, we sat and talked and discussed our day. It was nice to not feel rushed or pressured to hurry up and finish.

                So much of our time is spent looking towards the next big thing. Looking ahead to the next meeting, next assignment, next test. We spend so much time preparing for what is next that we often forget to live in the now. Lingering, I have learned, is more than just making more stops somewhere on your way to somewhere else. It is an opportunity to allow your mind to linger at the place instead. It provides a mental slowdown, which is often what we need in our over-stimulated, ultra-technologically advanced world. And so, I dare you. Let yourself linger more often. You will not be disappointed. 

Xoxo,

Ciara